I Would Never Draft a Quarterback...

"I would always get my quarterback through free agency. Granted I would miss out on the Peyton Manning's of the world but I would always get my quarterback through free agency." Cap'n Douche

Yes that's a solid choice Cap'n Douche. To see just how solid of a choice it is, let's look at who has lead their teams to the Super Bowl Title the past few seasons?

2008: Pittsburgh, Ben Roethlisburger, DRAFTED
2007: New York Giants, Eli Manning, DRAFTED
2006: Indianapolis Colts, Peyton Manning, DRAFTED
2005: Pittsburgh, Ben Roethlisburger, DRAFTED
2004: New England Patriots, Tom Brady, DRAFTED
2003: New England Patriots, Tom Brady, DRAFTED
2002: Tampa Bay Buccaneers, Brad Johnson, Free Agent or Trade
2001: New England Patriots, Tom Brady, DRAFTED
2000: Baltimore Ravens, Trent Dilfer, Free Agent or Trade
1999: St. Louis Rams, Kurt Warner, Free Agent or Trade
1998: Denver Broncos, John Elway, DRAFTED
1997: Denver Broncos, John Elway, DRAFTED
1996: Green Bay Packers, Brett Favre, Free Agent or Trade
1995: Dallas Cowboys, Troy Aikman, DRAFTED
1994: San Francisco, Steve Young, Free Agent or Trade
1993: Dallas Cowboys, Troy Aikman, DRAFTED
1992: Dallas Cowboys, Troy Aikman, DRAFTED
1991: Washington Redskins, Mark Rypien, DRAFTED
1990: New York Giants, Jeff Hostetler, DRAFTED
1989: San Fransisco, Joe Montana, DRAFTED

The vast majority of Super Bowl winning QBs were garnered via the draft. Johnson and Dilfer won on the backs of their defenses. Favre and Young were acquired on the cheap after failed experiments at their previous stops and Kurt Warner was pulled out of Arena Football. No Super Bowl winner in the past 20 seasons has had a major free agent quarterback lead their team to the Super Bowl. But ya, if your team was run by Cowherd that's what you'd be looking for.

If I Was the GM Of the Orlando Magic...

Just for good measure Cap'n Douche decided to close out his show with this.

"If I was the GM of the Orlando Magic I bring in Lebron James. If you could find a way to trade Rashard Lewis, you bring in Lebron. No state tax. Get Lebron."

"Why go to New York? I want to be a brand. [in his squeeky voice] Go to Orlando. Put the best player in the NBA with the best center in the NBA and win 10 championships." Cap'n Douche

Is it just fun for Cap'n Douche to throw out ridiculous impossible things just for fun. Rashard Lewis is making 17.5 mill this year than 18.9, 20.5, 22.1, and 24 million dollars over the course of the next four seasons. He's untradeable.

Cap'n Douche is like the retarded radio caller that suggests the Yankees package Kei Igawa and Melky Cabrera for Albert Pujols.

If I was the Giants I Would....

Darren Woodson on The Herd discussing the impact of not having Plaxico Burress on the Giants. Woodson was discussing how Plaxico's size and dynamic abilities force teams into double teaming him and makes running the offense easier for everyone, which eventually lead to Cap'n Douche's General Management suggestions.

"The Giants have a ton of depth. If I was the Giants GM I would go to the Lions and get Calvin Johnson. " Cap'n Douche

"Hahahah, you're not getting Calvin Johnson." Woodson

"I'd offer them one of my 32 running backs." Cap'n Douche

The sad part is that he was completely serious about the Giants getting Johnson, as if there is any chance in the world of the Lions giving up their only good player. Grade A Analysis there.